When You’re the One Standing in the Way of Someone Else’s Dream
- vasallophoto
- 4 days ago
- 4 min read
The week before Halloween, my 12-year-old daughter came home with a mission.
There was no Halloween party planned at her school, and she couldn’t believe it. New to the school, she assumed it was something the school organized every year—but it turned out that in previous years, it had been run by a family who’d since moved away.
Most kids would’ve sighed and let it go. But not her.
She wanted a party.
Within hours, she rallied several friends to join her in proposing the idea to the middle school director. Together, they went to his office and asked if they could organize it themselves. He said yes—and even gave them a budget of four million Indonesian rupiah (about $250). He was also very clear: this had to be a student-led activity. He wasn’t getting involved, and he didn’t want other teachers involved either.
It was Thursday. The party was scheduled for the following Thursday—six days away.
And here’s the part I’m not proud of: I told her I didn’t think it was a good idea.
I had just recovered from being sick, I was low on energy, and I didn’t want to get dragged into a last-minute event. The director’s words—“student-led”—felt like divine permission to step aside.
But my daughter didn’t need permission. She heard my “no,” smiled, and kept going.
Obstacle #1: Me
When she asked for my help, I said, “No, I’m not getting involved.”
When she lost her voice that weekend after two full days of first aid training, I told her again, “This is too much. You need rest.”
But she didn’t listen.
Obstacle #2: Rules
When their idea for pizza and donuts was rejected by the school director—because it didn’t “align with school values”—the girls didn’t back down. They told him they had already ordered the pizzas. He smiled and said he’d let it slide this time only.
Once again, they got their way. Their dream, their vision.
Obstacle #3: Me… again
On Friday afternoon, I spotted my daughter and one of her friends at the school’s Spirit Friday market—basket in hand—asking parents to donate money for their Halloween party.
I cringed. Everyone else had stands selling things, and these two were just… asking?
I wanted to pull her aside and say, “You can’t just ask for money. You need to earn it.”
But she waved and said, “See you at home, Mom.”
A few hours later, she walked through the door beaming. They’d raised another two million rupiah (around $120).
Over the weekend, the momentum continued. The girls formed committees, planned decorations, coordinated costumes, found a DJ (an 11th grader who volunteered), and even got the middle school band to play!
When she came to me again—this time asking me to post a potluck message in the parents’ group—I hesitated once more.
“There’s no time,” I told her. “It’s too last-minute, parents can’t cook this late in the game.”
But then I ran into a few moms at school who said, “Oh, we’d love to contribute!”
So I gave in and posted the message. And guess what? Parents jumped at the chance.
By Wednesday afternoon—the eve of the party—the photo booth had been contracted, the decorations were up, the food orders were placed, and every last detail was somehow ready to go.
Seventy to eighty middle schoolers showed up to the party, danced, laughed, and celebrated together—complete with a DJ, a live band, a costume contest, and restaurant-donated prizes.
They’d pulled it off. All of it.
No adults running the show. Just kids, determination, and heart.
Here’s what that night taught me:
Don’t become the obstacle to someone else’s dream.
Even when it comes from love and “practical advice,” sometimes our caution is actually fear disguised as wisdom. My daughter didn’t need me to protect her from failure—she needed me to get out of her way.
Persistence isn’t loud—it’s steady.
She didn’t complain, convince, or wait for help. She just kept moving forward, one small step at a time. Every “no” became fuel for the next idea.
When someone close to you is growing, it can stir something in you.
Sometimes when those we love want to expand or change, it requires us to shift too—and that can feel uncomfortable. Without realizing it, we may try to slow them down, not because we don’t believe in them, but because their growth reminds us that change is inevitable—and uncomfortable—for us too.
Watching my daughter in action reminded me of something we often forget as adults: when desire is pure and purpose is clear, the universe rushes to support it.
Every obstacle softened under her persistence.
Every “no” found a way to become a “yes.”
She didn’t wait for certainty or comfort—she led with conviction.
And isn’t that how most dreams are built?
Not in perfect conditions. Not with unanimous support.
But in the messy, uncertain middle—when you keep going anyway.
I’d love to hear your thoughts, please comment below. Has there been a time when you almost gave up on something—only to realize that persistence was the very thing that turned it around?
Or have you gotten in the way of someone else’s dreams because it meant discomfort and change for you?
Tell me—I’d love to know.
With love and courage,
Tania ❤️💫
