The Truth About Thanksgiving: How to Stay Grateful When Everything Goes Sideways
- vasallophoto
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
The Saturday after Thanksgiving always invites a pause. The rush settles, the noise quiets, and what remains is the simple question: What does gratitude look like for me this year?
For me, it’s looked nothing like a curated holiday. It’s looked like real life in Bali—messy, unpredictable, surprising, and strangely beautiful.
This week alone, one neighbor’s son battled lice… twice. After she disinfected every sheet, helmet, and surface, the lice returned three days later. Another friend’s son had a tough case of Bali belly followed by an eczema-like rash around his eye. And my daughter had her second allergic reaction in a month—either to a drink she’s had before or one of the hairy caterpillars that seem to be everywhere right now. Even her friend developed a skin reaction.
It’s been a week of hives, rashes, swollen eyes, and a lot of “What on earth is happening?”
And still… gratitude kept showing up.
Because gratitude isn’t the absence of challenge. It’s the ability to notice what’s good inside the challenge.
Like the fact that my daughter is taking scuba diving as a school class. She went down 18 meters this week. Saw manta rays. A baby shark.
That kind of exposure, adventure, and confidence at age 12 is something I never imagined for her. And watching her grow up in this environment—despite the sacrifices and challenges we’ve walked through to make this move—is something I will never stop being thankful for.
Or the Thanksgiving gathering by the pool at at next door Village. Nothing “traditional” about it. No matching plates—in fact, no plates at all. We ate from bamboo baskets lined with banana leaves. And there were very few places to sit. But families from all over the world showed up, carrying last-minute dishes and stories, and somehow it was perfect in its simplicity.
Then there were the puppies.
Two litters of them.
One I wrote about recently, and another we discovered living underneath a local spa. Tiny, wiggly, so sweet. We’ve been bringing them food every day—our little dose of puppy therapy that brightens everything. I’m thankful for them too, these unexpected pockets of joy.
And woven into all of this was something quieter:
This is the first Black Friday in years where I didn’t buy a single thing because access is different here. No Amazon. No quick online carts. And honestly? It felt refreshing. It made me realize how often we connect gratitude to acquiring or upgrading. Maybe gratitude is also found in the moments we don’t add anything new. When simplicity becomes its own kind of abundance.
So here’s my truth this week:
Gratitude doesn’t need perfect conditions. It only needs willingness.
It doesn’t require ideal health, perfect days, or curated celebrations. It doesn’t depend on whether your holiday looked the way you imagined.
Gratitude is the way we keep choosing to see what’s still good—what’s still working, still blooming, still surprising us—right in the middle of real life.
If your Thanksgiving looked different this year—if it was improvised, messy, emotional, or simply not what you expected—I recorded a short podcast episode about that, (listen here) You can listen to it if you want a little extra companionship or reflection around this holiday.
As you settle into this weekend, here’s the question I’m sitting with—one I’ll leave you with too:
Where can gratitude meet you today, exactly as things are?
With love and courage,
Tania
